“You Should Be Back to Normal by Now…” - by Mariana Arnaut

“You Should Be Back to Normal by Now…” How many times have you heard those words?

Maybe it came from a well-meaning friend. A co-worker. A family member. Or maybe, it was the quiet voice in your own head.

There’s an expectation that once cancer treatment ends, everything snaps back into place. That your energy returns. That your body feels familiar again. That your life resumes where it left off.

But for many survivors, that’s far from reality.

After treatment ends, the healing begins and it’s rarely fast, easy, or linear. The body is recovering. The mind is catching up. The heart is processing a thousand emotions that couldn’t be fully felt in survival mode.

You might:

• Still feel exhausted - not just tired, but bone-deep fatigue that doesn’t lift with rest.

• Mourn what’s changed - in your body, your identity, your relationships, your outlook.

• Struggle with the invisible - fear of recurrence, cognitive fog, a sense of disconnection.

• Feel like a stranger in your own skin - navigating scars, hormonal changes, new limitations.

  
  

And through it all, you may be wondering if you’re doing something wrong. You’re not.

Healing after cancer is not a return to the old you. It’s the slow and deeply personal process of learning how to live again in a body and life that have been forever changed.

You are allowed to take your time. You are allowed to rest. You are allowed to grieve and grow and feel messy and uncertain.

There’s no timeline. No finish line. No “normal” to get back to. There is only your pace. Your process. Your healing.